Category Archives: Popular Culture

Photoshop Phun

“I’m ready for my closeup, America.” I finally worked out what Crazy Eyes Pelosi reminds me of. And if you don’t recognize this film, you, Sir, suffer from a criminal lack of gayness. Campest, creepiest flick ever. Advertisements

Short and crabby

Checkout line of the supermarket, you hand the woman a twenty, she takes that long-ass receipt you get these days because they itemize every can of Friskies individually (might as well, it’s all going in the GIANT GOVERNMENT DATABASE anyhow, which is why I’m paying cash), folds this banner up two or three times, puts […]

I feel your pain, man

I got lumbered with a really boring, dense job this week. I have to take a bunch of files, convert them to other files, open them up, make niggling superficial corrections to them, cross-link them to each other, index them and save the lot to a shared drive. Sounds like a job for Super Batch […]

Reducing a difficult moral dilemma to a no-brainer

So, in the natural order of Sunday mornings, I’d been surfing the Web for an hour before I actually regained consciousness. I awoke to discover I was playing Find the Picture at Highlights for Children. Remember Highlights? Remember Find the Picture? Remember Find the Picture being so goddamn difficult you thought you were going to […]

Before there was YouTube

The weenies in the corporate IS department have suddenly blocked YouTube. Now my blog-surfing experience has big holes in it. Honestly, how they expect me to do my job without the toilet flushing cat, I do not know. Now that I’m the blogosphere’s nerdy kid who smells funny and doesn’t get what the cool kids […]

S. Weasel, habitual liar

The devil controls them by radar? WTF?! Can you think of a paramilitary operation best undertaken in tropical swimwear? Imagine a stray shell casing flies out and lodges someplace…cleavagey. Those suckers burn. You’d be all jumping and jiving and “Oooo! I am so going to shoot you when I stop jiggling and squealing!”   Okay, […]

The moving finger writes

Spotted through a very rainy windshield this afternoon. The best touch is the “Merry Christmas XXX” in the bottom right. Or maybe the jaunty sketch of poo in the upper right. Writing rude things in the dirt on (the ubiquitous) white delivery van is an artform here. The best one I’ve seen so far is […]

The True Meaning of Boxing Day

There isn’t one. There’s a consensus that the day after Christmas has something to do with boxes, and something to do with Christmas…beyond that, nada. These days, it’s a big shopping day in the UK. Two thousand people queued up outside Selfridges in London this morning. But not us. It’s a gray, gray day and […]

The True Meaning of Christmas

The true meaning of Christmas is, as any nine year old could tell you, the loot. Booty. Swag. Plunder. Gelt. It is rich food and rich drink, too. It’s a nap in the afternoon if you damn well want one. It’s one thoroughly sybaritic day at the ass end of a long, tough year, just […]

Boo!

Did you ever think it odd that the Christmas Carol, our most famous bit of Christmas fiction, is a ghost story? Did you? Really? You’re an ignorant sack of filth, then. The ghost story has been a feature of British Christmas celebration since…well, I’m not sure when. Early Victorian times, anyhow. You can see how […]